Sunday, August 03, 2008

Crazy is as crazy does

My daughter Sunshine has been gainfully employed for the summer at a large pet supply chain store. Every day she comes home, sighs and groans, "Work was SO boring!" As a teacher, I would LOVE to have a day like that, so I can NOT relate. The other day, however, brought a break in her otherwise boring routine of scanning pigs' ears, cat litter, and giving free milkbones to ugly mutts who don't eat them anyway and drop the slobbery treats on the floor for her to pick up.

A lady approached her with a baggy with exactly 5 pieces of dog food in it. She went on to explain that they had adopted a puppy who would only eat this one type of food, but the lady's husband (ain't it always the husband's fault?) threw out the bag and they could not remember what make and model of food it was. She was hoping that my daughter would recognize the dog food and lead her to it. Yeah. Right. If you've ever been in one of those pet superstores, you know there are hundreds of brands, flavors, and blends for everything from "Ferret-flavored for Pitbulls" to "CAT LITTER CRUNCHIES FOR PUPPIES NAMED ALLIE THAT STILL AREN'T HOUSEBROKEN EVEN THOUGH HER OWNER HAS BEEN WORKING WITH HER FOR NEARLY 3 MONTHS!!!!!!!!!" Oops, sorry. Anger issues.

Of course my Sunshine had not a clue, so she asked a co-worker whom Sunshine describes as "manish." Manish "Linda" is very nice... too nice. She's one of those people who within 5 minutes of meeting you will tell you about her mother's hysterectomy, her son's ADD diagnosis, and why her underwear keeps riding up. So Linda takes the baggy, opens it, and EATS a piece of the dog food.

The customer stood there dumbfounded, while Sunshine actually wasn't shocked, sadly.

Linda calmly chomps and gulps down the kibble and states, "It tastes like Science Diet."

HOW WOULD SHE KNOW?????????????? I mean, does this woman go home each night and snack on all the different varieties of dog food in the off-chance that some customer will come in and ask, "Which dog food tastes the most like real lamb?" ???????????

In the end, they never did figure out what the dog food was, but the customer was impressed with Linda and commented, "Now that's what I call going above and beyond the call of duty."

I'm really glad Linda doesn't work in a pharmaceutical lab.

5 comments:

Karate Mom said...

Wow...that's a special brand of crazy!

CrossView said...

Um.
*zipping my mouth shut here*

ROFL!

:)De said...

Years ago I had a foster child that ate more dog food than the dog did and I later learned that he had eaten his fair share at another foster home previous to mine. Sounds like there is a future job for that youngster!

:)De

40winkzzz said...

OK, that's just scary.

Although I bet my #3 has eaten dog food. I should ask him. On second thought, I don't think I want to know.

Indian Lake Papa said...

Yuk ! however, I eat sardines - dead little fishies whole in a can!